Rock Life: The Rock Simulator

I feel I've barely scratched the surface of this Rock game. Truly an immersive experience into the life of a rock. I made it about 13 hours before I discovered you can actually change the rock between a few options, simply incredible. I rate this game Rock/10. I'm hoping this game can get Steam Deck verified so I can rock on the go. Can confirm it does work! 88 Hour update: I discovered you can be a rock in a Zen garden. Must repeat prior my play-through in this new arena. 150 hour update: I am one with stone. I found comfort in the googly eye rock and have named him Skippy. I do believe there is a further level of insanity to be found in the next 50 hours of game play. I can only hope Skippy's company is enough to continue further. I hear rumors of yet another map to round out my experience and perhaps will soon attempt another session of Rock intimacy. Those who are asking for sex don't understand, this is a mental journey, not a physical one. 200 hour update: I feel my journey is completed. While I leave my companion Skippy open and running during the night so that I make continue to dream of my life as a rock, steam crashes and I awake to my nightmares being realized. I will not reach the final achievement available. However on my journey I learned much from my companion, Skippy taught me the ways of stone and rock, and how to lead a Boulder life. I will cherish these past couple weeks and remember fondly of our time together. I shall forever remain unyielding in my travels, and remember that to leave no stone turned over for they cannot move. There is no God, no politics, no bills nor no debts. There is only rock, for a rock cares little for these trivial things. Long after the world has collapsed and failed, long past nuclear winters and global warming, there shall still by Skippy the stone. Forever unchanging, forever stone. Rock/10 I suggest everyone stop worrying about life for a moment and just enjoy being a rock for a week or so. Alas my life must travel onwards now. Good bye Skippy, May your unjudging stare never falter. Let the waters of this river wash you clean forever.

---{ Graphics }--- ☑ You forget what reality is ☐ Beautiful ☐ Good ☐ Decent ☐ Bad ☐ Don‘t look too long at it ☐ MS-DOS ---{ Gameplay }--- ☑ Very good ☐ Good ☐ It's just gameplay ☐ Mehh ☐ Watch paint dry instead ☐ Just don't ---{ Audio }--- ☑ Eargasm ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☐ Not too bad ☐ Bad ☐ I'm now deaf ---{ Audience }--- ☑ Kids ☑ Teens ☑ Adults ☑ Grandma ---{ PC Requirements }--- ☑ Check if you can run paint ☐ Potato ☐ Decent ☐ Fast ☐ Rich boi ☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer ---{ Difficulty }--- ☑ Just press 'W' ☐ Easy ☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master ☐ Significant brain usage ☐ Difficult ☐ Dark Souls ---{ Grind }--- ☑ Nothing to grind ☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks ☐ Isn't necessary to progress ☐ Average grind level ☐ Too much grind ☐ You'll need a second life for grinding ---{ Story }--- ☐ No Story ☐ Some lore ☐ Average ☐ Good ☐ Lovely ☑ It'll replace your life ---{ Game Time }--- ☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee ☐ Short ☐ Average ☐ Long ☑ To infinity and beyond ---{ Price }--- ☑ It's free! ☐ Worth the price ☐ If it's on sale ☐ If u have some spare money left ☐ Not recommended ☐ You could also just burn your money ---{ Bugs }--- ☑ Never heard of ☐ Minor bugs ☐ Can get annoying ☐ ARK: Survival Evolved ☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs ---{ ? / 10 }--- ☐ 1 ☐ 2 ☐ 3 ☐ 4 ☐ 5 ☐ 6 ☐ 7 ☐ 8 ☐ 9 ☑ 10

I wasn't expecting to be able to live out the rock scene from Everything Everywhere All At Once, but I am delighted to say that a truly visionary developer has made dare I say the epitome of the greatest game ever created. Please see my high-effort review format below that cannot be found in any other reviews on Steam, because I am the first to come up with such a format. ---{Graphics}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Beautiful ☐ Good ☐ Decent ☐ Bad ☐ Don‘t look too long at it ☐ Paint.exe ---{Gameplay}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Good ☐ It‘s just gameplay ☐ Mehh ☐ Starring at walls is better ☐ Just don‘t ---{Audio}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☐ Not too bad ☐ Bad ☐ Earrape ---{Audience}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Teens ☐ Adults ☐ Human ☐ Lizards ---{PC Requirements}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Potato ☐ Decent ☐ Fast ☐ Rich boiiiiii ☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer ---{Difficulity}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Easy ☐ Significant brain usage ☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master ☐ Difficult ☐ Dark Souls ---{Grind}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks ☐ Isnt necessary to progress ☐ Average grind level ☐ Too much grind ☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding ---{Story}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Text or Audio floating around ☐ Average ☐ Good ☐ Lovely ☐ It‘ll replace your life ---{Game Time}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Short ☐ Average ☐ Long ☐ To infinity and beyond ---{Price}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Worth the price ☐ If u have some spare money left ☐ Not recommended ☐ You could also just burn your money ---{Bugs}--- ☑ Rock ☐ Minor bugs ☐ Can get annoying ☐ ARK: Survival Evolved ☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs